Next Appointment

Just wanted to let you all know that my dad's next appointment is August 10th. He will have a CT scan done and chemo as well. I will keep you all updated. Check this site as I will be posting as often as I can.

By the way, my mom's birthday was yesterday (Thursday, the 30th). My mom reads this blog and your comments. So if you want to put a little late happy birthday comment on here to her she would love it. Sorry I didn't post yesterday to where you could actually tell her happy birthday on her actual birthday.

Just want to leave you all with a verse. May you apply this verse to your life today and every day.

Colossians 3:12-14 (The Message):
So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It's your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

Wearing love so people can see God's love,
Bridget

Painful Purpose

Title: Painful Purpose
Verse 1:
Pain pain go away
Come again another day
I can't wish the pain away
It's here to stay

Chorus 1:
God You ease the pain
You give me Your grace
To face another day
You're carrying me through the pain

Verse 2:
Where does life have you?
Would you rather be somewhere else?
Just know

Chorus 2:
God will ease your pain
He will give you His grace
To face another day
He will carry you through the pain

Bridge:
There's purpose in our pain
Because that's when God really shines
We know that

Chorus 3:
God will ease our pain
He will give us His grace
To face another day
He will carry us through the pain

Just something that I have written in my journal. The best way to describe it is God's voice speaking through mine. Also, I am posting another blog with another page from my journal and will update you about my dad in that blog. I hope these words have encouraged you. Life brings pain and sometimes God takes it away just as fast as it came and other times God says I'm not going to take the pain away but I am going to carry you through it. That is what God has told to our family. The pain is here and right now it's here to stay but I'm thankful that God promises to carry me through it and it's the same thing He will do for you. I actually wrote this page in my journal during this cancer journey I'm on with my dad. God is doing an amazing work in my heart as He is showing me that He truely is a Savior that never leaves my side even when I feel like He is nowhere to be found. May you know that God is there for you in your painful purpose that He has for your life.

Thankful for the purpose God has in my pain,
Bridget

Out of Hospital

When people ask us how in the world we can keep our balance during such stormy times, we don't boast. We don't brag. We point unabashedly to the One who makes it possible. Our eyes are on Jesus.

~ Max Lucado

Just wanted all of you to know that my dad got of the hospital today (Saturday). Pray that he will not have any reactions to the chemo. He is doing good just tired. Pray for his energy, appetite, no reactions, and his spirits to stay up. Thank you all for your support, love, and prayers for our family.

May when people ask you how you are able to face another day may you point to the One who gives you another day. We may not know what tomorrow holds but we know Who holds tomorrow and that is more than enough. That is not to say that I wake up every morning excited to face another day but I turn my day over to God and say You are going to have to help me get through another day. Even though I don't understand and have many questions with no answers I trust You anyway. Help to let go of how it should be. Help me to make my life matter today. Help me to love people like You do. I love You. And I start another day and make it through by God's grace. I have good and bad days. In every good and bad day I'm quick to call on the help, grace, and strength of my Savior so that I will live my life to make it matter that day and not think too far ahead but to focus just on today because for right now that is what God has given me.

It's crazy to think that school for me will be starting soon. It brings me back to last year when I started. It's hard to think back last year before December because that is how it should be right now: my dad without cancer and it's not. This journey for me has truly been a process and slowly but surely I'm learning God is a God that is working this for my good. How? Most days I can't see it but I'm trusting that He is and God wants only what is best for me. The holidays are hard thinking back to last year and soon in December the year anniversary will be coming up. Yet I make it through the holidays and another day because I am looking and pointing to the One that makes it possible.

Each day becomes possible because of Who holds that day,
Bridget

Servant of All

Give yourself fully to God. He will use you to accomplish great things on the condition that you believe much more in His love than in your own weakness.
~ Mother Teresa

Just wanted all of you to know that my dad's prodecure went well today. I told you wrong in the other blog about the chemo. The chemo will be for 48 hours. Then he will get another type of chemo for 60 minutes. He was in a lot of pain today. They were able to bring the pain level down which was a blessing for my dad. Pray that he will have no reactions to this chemo, his appetite, pain level, energy, and his spirits. Thank you for the prayers and love that have been shown to our family. Check here daily as I will try my best to post on here to keep you all posted.

Whatever your weaknesses are which we all have them may you show them and believe much more in God's love for you than your weakness. Also, may you show your weakness and not try to hide them. When we are weak that is when God is strong. Delight in your weakness because it's when we are weak that we really allow God to become our strength. Give every part of yourselve to God because that is how we can truely live our lives to make them matter.

Thank you all for showing our family what it truely means to love our neighbors as ourselves. May we look to others needs and not just our own.

May we show kindness the way Philippians 2: 1-4 The Message says:
If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if His love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care - then do Me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don't push your way to the front; don't sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourselve aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obessed with getting your own advantage. Forget about yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.

Could it be that be that God calls us to serve because He knows the joy that comes from being the Servant of all? I think so. Something for us to consider and apply to our lives.

Until next time,
Bridget

Suffering Job

For any person who has tried to see God through shattered glass He speaks.
For those of us who have dared to say "If God is God . . . ," He speaks.
He speaks out of the storm and into the storm, for that is where Job is. That is where God is best heard.
All his life, Job had been a good man. All his life, he had believed in God. All his life, he had discussed God, had notions about Him, and prayed to Him.
But in the storm, Job sees Him.
He sees Hope. Lover. Destroyer. Giver. Taker. Deamer. Deliverer.
Job sees God - and that is enough.
For God gave Job more than Job ever dreamed. God gave Job Himself.
~ Max Lucado

Just wanted all of you to know that my dad will have 24 hours of chemo instead of the 48 hours of chemo tomorrow (Wednesday). Also, when he gets off the 24 hour chemo he will have another type of chemo for 60 minutes instead of 90 minutes. My dad has gained 4 pounds which is awesome. He will get taken to the back to prepare to have the line inserted into the liver at 9:00. Pray that the line getting inserted into the liver goes well and the line goes where it is supposed to go. Also, pray for his appetite, energy, and his spirits to stay up. I will let you all know how he is doing and when he gets out of the hosiptal. Thank you all for the prayers and please countinue them.

The quotes above are from a book I read called In the Eye of the Storm by Max Lucado. It's a good book if you are looking for one to read. In one of the chapters Max talked about Job. If you read the book of Job you will see that Job had a lot of suffering he went through. Job lost all his children, cattle, property, health, and pretty much everything that belonged to him. Even through it all Job instead of turning his back on God choose the unshakable faith that God offered him. Job knew that he served the God who gives and takes away and choose to say blessed be the name of the Lord. Job understand that he could have everything taken away from him but one thing and the most important thing to Job couldn't be taken away. The love of God and his realationship with his Creator. Job had his moments where he didn't understand and questioned God's plans. Job knew what it was like to have ye of little faith moments yet even in those moments Job still choose to trust that God truely had plans to give him a hope and a future even if Job couldn't see it. One thing is for certian Job choose even through the storm in his life to see God and embace the God who has nailed scared hands and understands the very defintion of suffering and pain.

Maybe in your life right now you have a shattered glass situation. It's my prayer that you will let God shine His light and love through the cracks. God understands that you will have your moments of ye of little faith. Even in those moments God doesn't point His finger at you saying you should have more faith but says it's okay and I'm here to comfort and love on you. Let Job be our example. The example of a person who lived a good life and loved God but still had suffering in his life but choose to realize that he had God who promised to never leave him or forsake him and for Job and for us it is more than enough. Through all the suffering Job went through he got more than he ever dreamed. Job expericed God in a whole new way and that is my prayer for you. That whatever you are going through that you would embace God and experince God in a very real and personal way. God is already embacing us in our suffering. The only question to ask ourselves is will we embace the God that never leaves our side?

Embacing God on the journey called life,
Bridget

Appointments and Check-In Tomorrow (Tuesday)

We are all pencils in the hand of God.

I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world.

~ Mother Theresa

Just wanted all of you to know that my dad has blood test and docter's appointment tomorrow (Tuesday). Also, tomorrow (Tuesday) night he will get admitted into the hosiptal. Then on Wednesday he will get the line inserted into his liver and have chemo for 48 hours. After he gets off the 48 hour chemo he will get another type of chemo for 90 minutes. Pray the line getting inserted into the liver goes well. Also, pray that he will have no reactions to the chemo, for his appetite, energy, and his spirits. Thank you all for your love, support, and prayes you have given our family.

The two quotes above are something I want to blog about at length. My first question for you to think about is what kind of pencils are you in the hand of God? Are you willing pencils? Are you pencils where He decides the colors and drawings that go in your picture? Does God have hold of your pencil or are you holding on to it tightly refusing to let go? Are you a dull pencil or a sharp pencil? We are pencils and we need to let God do the writing. Sometimes though we think our handwriting is cutter or prettier than the handwriting of God. We think we can draw more creative pictures than He can. We choose better colors than He does and we decide it's okay if we become the luke worm dull pencils.

Willing pencils isn't something that comes that easily for us. We may be willing to give some of our time, help other people that need help, or even go on a mission trip. But Lord knows we become less than willing in certain circumstances. Maybe for you the circumstances include moving somewhere else, having a child that is into drugs/alcohol, sickness in your family, finiancial situations, getting told that today is your last day at work, facing a death in your life, your dream not coming true, shame and guilt leaving you feeling worthless, having someone overseas serving our country, and many more. There are many circumstances in life that can leave us less than willing. I'm learning though that God wants to use our lives/pencils to write His love in every circumstance.

The colors that God chooses. God can choose a color and we think we have a better color. Right now in your life God may have given you a dark color in your picture/painting and you long for a brighter color. The dark color in your life can come in many different hard circumstances. I know though that even though you may have been given a dark color in your life right now that God wants to to be the light and bright color in the dark color that is in your life. We can go through the dark colors in our life knowing that God has a bright color waiting for us as He takes our ashes and turns them into beauty. While He takes the ashes and turns them into beauty through our lives and being the willing pencils in His hand God is writing His love letter to the world.

Willing pencil in the hands of a loving God,
Bridget

Heading back to M.D. Anderson

Just wanted to let all of you know that we are heading back to M.D. Anderson tomorrow (Sunday). Pray for safe travel. I will let all of you know when we get there.

My dad's chemo is on Tuesday the 21st. Pray that the line getting inserted into the liver goes well. He will have chemo for 48 hours. Then another type of chemo for 90 minutes. Pray for no reactions to this chemo. Also, pray for his energy, strength, appetite, and spirits.

Thank you all for the support and love you have given our family. Despite what we are going through as individuals and a family I'm so glad to say that I'm truely blessed and so thankful to the God that gives and takes away.

Serving the God who gives and takes away and saying blessed be the name of the Lord,
Bridget